How to tell if you are in a black hole.

With everyone worried about being sucked into a black hole by CERN I tried to imagine what it might be like once we were there. Here are my 10 ideas of how to tell if it has happened.

1. you cannot see the stars or they all seem redish or blueish (the earth got sucked into the black hole, maybe even the sun but it has not sucked everything in, yet)
2. you could have sworn that only yesterday your kids were just babies (event horizon effect if they were sucked in before you.)
3. you find yourself in a state of timeless tranquility (the black hole only sucked in time, not matter. The earth is still outside)
4. you find a lot of people jammed all around you (you have become a singularity)
5. you seem to be reliving the same events, meetings that discuss the same topics, same sort of relationships over and over (we have fallen into a time loop)
6. suddenly your significant other seems to have a new personality, you seem to be in a really bad streak of bad luck, things you’ve planed out well don’t work (you are now in a parallel universe where things may have developed differently)
7. you have friends who eat a lot and do not gain weight, food you you used to like now tastes horrible, you swear that you weren’t going over 60mph but the officer still gives you a ticket for going 80mph (the earth is now in another universe where the laws of physics are different)
8. you suddenly find yourself forgetting things that just happened, maybe even dreaming about something that has not happened yet (time has reversed, you’ve forgotten yesterday because it has not happened yet.)
9. no matter how early you leave for work you are always late, you cannot seem to finish anything that you have started (time is warping)
10. your hair is a mess (selective spaghettification has occurred only on your hair, consider yourself lucky that the rest of you is not as messy, either that or you are still on the event horizon and should prepare yourself for the worst)

Tags: black hole